What Is “No Kings Day”?

“No Kings Day” refers to a nationwide protest movement aimed at opposing what participants view as authoritarian, king-like behavior by President Donald Trump.

It took place on June 14, 2025 coinciding with Trump’s birthday and the 250th anniversary of the U.S. Army, a combination that practically begged for satire.

Across the U.S., millions marched, waved signs, and chanted slogans like “No Kings,” “We the People,” and “Crowns Are for Royal Idiots.” Ironically, it might be the first time in history that protesters told someone not to rule them.

There’s even an organization dedicated to the cause — NoKings.org — a convenient hub for imbeciles to gather together and protest something that doesn’t even exist.

No Kings Day and the Culture of Political Outrage

If America loves anything more than fast food and reality TV, it’s outrage. “No Kings Day” perfectly captures that addiction. A made-for-TV event where people burn calories shouting at clouds. The protest wasn’t about policy, reform, or real issues; it was about feelings. The national pastime of pretending to save democracy by waving signs at people who don’t care.

Why the Outrage?

Let’s unpack why people were so mad or at least, why they said they were.

The Parade Problem: Trump organized (or at least basked in) a massive military parade on his birthday. To critics, it looked less like patriotism and more like coronation cosplay.

The Power Play: His use of the National Guard and federal enforcement in domestic settings triggered fears that the republic was slowly being replaced by a reality-show monarchy.

The Symbolism: Parades, flags, and a cheering crowd can look a little too regal when the guy in the center happens to be the most polarizing figure in modern politics.

The Irony: The very act of screaming “No Kings” at a democratically elected leader kind of makes the protest itself the most American thing ever and absurdly stupid.

The “lesson in stupidity” here? Comparing a monarch to the President of the United States.

Trump’s Response: Classic Comedy

What did Trump do when faced with No Kings Day? He responded as no president before him ever would.

He publicly insisted, “I’m not a king,” which is true. If he were a king, there wouldn’t be a government shutdown because kings don’t need Congress to pass a budget. They just wave a hand and make it happen.

Then, in true Trump fashion, he posted an AI-generated video of himself wearing a crown, flying a jet labeled King Trump, and dumping sludge on protesters because if you’re going to deny you’re a king, you might as well act like one in 4K.

I personally think it’s hysterical that Trump trolls the people who dislike him. The man could announce free pizza for every American, and half the country would riot not over the toppings, but because Trump assumed everyone likes pizza. (Everyone does, right?)

Loudly proclaiming, “I am not a king,” while digitally cosplaying as one isn’t just trolling. It’s performance art and in this political circus, Trump remains both the ringmaster and the punchline.

Trump isn’t a King

Trump isn’t a king. If he were, there wouldn’t be a government shutdown because there wouldn’t be a Congress to fight with or a protest to mock. As long as America keeps turning politics into theater and outrage into a national pastime, events like “No Kings Day” will keep popping up making America dumber for again protesting something that doesn’t even exist.

So bow to common sense, not to crowns.